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Drew starts hitting his stomach to the beat. The car begins shaking.

Me: Drew, stop! You’re shaking the car!
Drew: Really? I’m shaking the whole car?
Me: Yes.
Drew: Man, I’m powerful!
Me: Or fat.


We rarely stay up past 10:30. This weekend, we were up past 1. Hence the following conversation.

Me: You be the talk show host and I’ll be your guest.
Drew: Okay. Welcome to the Daily Show! Today’s guest is starring in her most current movie, “Why I Suck At Life”. Here’s a clip: Blahlalaahahblahblalala. Welcome Andrea Ackermann!

We cracked up for a good 10 minutes.

Drew is planning our vacation out west, and giving me the play-by-play.

Drew: Oh, and we’re going to drive to the top of Pike’s Peak!
Me: Cool!
Drew: “America the Beautiful” was inspired by the view from the top of that mug!

Anyone else see the Drew-esque-ness in this sentence?


It is a well known fact that Drew thinks he is the funnier half of the Ackermanns. I will often find him laughing at himself. I think I’m pretty funny too, and Drew laughs at what I say sometimes! I still don’t get credit for it.

Me: You think I’m funny, right?
Drew: Well yeah. But only because I MAKE you funny to myself.
Me: So you are taking credit for the fact that you think I’m funny?
Drew: Yep.

Drew: Let’s make out.
Me: No.
Drew: Fine, I’m leaving.

Me: I have Beyonce stuck in my head. “Replacing you is so eassaaayyyy…”
Drew: Hmm. I wonder if Beyonce is a liberal.
Me: Why?
Drew: “To the left, to the left…”

Me: John Mayer is sexy.
Drew: Yeah.

(long pause as Drew drives and I continue to look out the window)

Me: Wait, WHAT?!

So for my job (designing fire protection systems), I sometimes go out to survey job sites. Yesterday I was out on one such survey at a hospital, and I decided to grab lunch at the cafeteria. On the way to the cafeteria, I shared an elevator ride with this woman who had a hand puppet. I figured she just did little shows for the kids or something, and didn’t think too much of it. That is, until she and her puppet began having a two-way conversation. Here’s kind of how it went:

Woman: What floor?

Me: First.

Puppet (woman’s voice, of course): Oooooh! Can I push the button?

Woman: Why, of course you can!

Puppet: Yippee! (Woman makes puppet push button.)

Me: ?????????

Woman: So how is your day going?

Puppet: Great! Thanks for asking. How about you?

Woman: Oh, pretty good.

Puppet (to me): Oh yeah, she’s weird. She talks to dolls all day.

Me: Um, hehe…okay.

So I was like, wow. Maybe she really needed to practice. I don’t know. But something tells me that’s not something you see everyday! I mean, as far as I know, I was not in a mental hospital. I wish you could have seen it. Really. Anyhow, after that, a homeless guy in the cafeteria asked me for 30 more cents so he could buy a meal. I had no change, so I gave him a dollar. Then the cashier gave him the meal for free anyway. Then I ate the most abysmal-tasting cheeseburger of my entire life. I don’t even think it was beef.

It was an interesting day…

In other news, Drea is ecstatic because I am letting her buy the camera that she has been hounding me about FOREVER. :) Through a series of stipulations (including the sale of her wedding dress, her current camera, and forgoing the purchase of clothes for the next several months), Drea finally convinced me. I have also been warned that to test out the settings of her camera, we will be randomly stopping at locations deemed photo-worthy to take pictures. Ah, the sweet compromises of marriage. So, this blog should soon be featuring professional-quality photos a la my wife. Be ye prepared!